Thank Christ the police didn't write this one. Here's the written statement of the girlfriend of one of my parolees:
I was arrested Staurday 15th of may. I was charged with pisson of meth I was told that [boyfriend] wouldn't be charged with it. It was found In my makeup Bag. I took the charge now I belive what is right that all charges against [boyfriend] she be dropped on him thanks.
You see stuff like this and wonder how this guy is anything other than screwed.